Is The Idea Of Having A
Soul Mate Biblical?
by JACK WELLMAN ·
Is the
idea of having a soul mate biblical? Are there Bible verses that speak
about such a thing?
Friends
Souls Knitted Together
Do you have a very special
friend that is like no other in your life?
Maybe
it’s your spouse. Possibly it’s a childhood friend or someone in your
church that you can tell anything to without ever having to worry about them
sharing it with anyone else.
David
and Jonathan were such friends that it was said that their souls were knitted
together (1 Samuel
18:1).
The Hebrew
word used for “knitted” or “knit” is “qashar” and means “to tie, to bind
together” or “to league together” and this is exactly the kind of relationship
that David and
Jonathan had with one another.
Does
the Bible say such a thing about a relationship between a man and a woman?
The
Word for Soul
The word used in the Bible
for soul is “nephesh” and means “life” or “creature” as when God created man in
the Book of Genesis. It was said that He created man a living soul or “nephesh”
in the Hebrew.
In the
New Testament, specifically in Matthew 20:28, Jesus talks about
fearing God Who can cast both body and soul into hell. Jesus used the Greek
word “psyche” for soul. It means, like in the Old Testament, “breath” or “the
breath of life.”
So the
word for “soul” in both the Old and the New Testaments essentially means a
living, breathing creature or human being.
It
should be noted that the Greek word “psyche” is the same word used for the
mental capacity that a person has or their “psyche.”
The
Old Testament even says that “the soul that sins, it
shall die” (Ezekiel 18:4).
So now
that we have an understanding what the word “soul” means, we’ll move on a bit
later to see if the idea of having a soul mate is biblical or not.
What
does being Unequally Yoked Mean?
Paul clearly writes that
believers are not to be unequally yoked together with unbelievers in 2
Corinthians 6:14 “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers.
For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has
light with darkness?”
This
can apply to relationships between men and women and between men and men, as
well as women and women. This doesn’t mean that Christians can’t have
friendships with non-believers but it does mean that these relationships should
not be the closest ones we have.
No
believer should ever marry a non-believer nor should our souls be knit together
with someone who is not a fellow believer.
Again,
we can have friends that are non-believers, but we should not be “knit
together” like the word insinuates … souls that are knitted together like
threads in clothing are.
This
is because, as the Hebrew word means, it is wrong “to bind together” or “to
league together” with unbelievers.
We are
to live in the world but not be part of the world, and if our best friend or
our potential mate is an unbeliever, how can light have fellowship with
darkness?
Having
said that, if a believer is married to an unbeliever, they are not to leave or
divorce their spouse just because they’re not saved. Paul writes in 1 Corinthians
7:10-11; “the wife should not separate from her
husband (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to
her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife.”
Here
is why; “how do you know, wife, whether you will save
your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife” (1 Corinthians 7:26).
Are
There Soul Mates?
I cannot find the idea or
factual verses that each man or woman has a soul mate or that God has destined
a specific woman or man to be their spouse but there are exceptions.
That
does not mean that God does not know who we will marry or who He knew we’d marry,
if we’re already married. God is sovereign and is omniscient and knows
our future, meaning He knows everything about it.
The
Bible reveals that it was no accident that certain men and women ended up
marrying one another.
Men
and women like Abraham and Sarah, Isaac and Rebekah, Jacob and Rachel, Ruth and
Boaz, and even Queen Ester and the king, were all meant for each other.
David
and Jonathan had such a close relationship that it was perhaps even closer than
one in which a man and a woman marry, as when “Jonathan
made David swear again by his love for him, for he loved him as he loved his
own soul” (1 Samuel 20:17).
Men
and women can be soul mates. There is no doubt about that, because I became
friends with my wife before we married and I ended up marrying my best friend. I
believe our souls are knit together and that we are soul mates right now.
Are
there soul mates mentioned in the Bible between men and women? No, it
doesn’t say that specifically, but that idea does appear throughout the Bible
as in the case where God joined Adam and Eve together, and they were literally
made for one other.
The
Sovereignty of God
Since God is sovereign and
nothing happens outside of the will of God, then the person we marry must also
be part of the will of God.
Yes,
we have freewill, but I believe our choices do not ever surprise God. We
might not marry the person who is most compatible with us. But every marriage
has difficulties because any time you put two sinners together there’ll be
friction.
Some
might believe they married the wrong person because the person they married
might have deceived them into believing that they are a different person than
they really are. But God can even use evil for good (Genesis 50:20).
And
everything that we go through in life works out for our good in the end (Romans 8:28).
Conclusion
If we
are still single, we might like to believe that God has a specific soul mate
for us.
I
cannot understand how a sovereign God works all things out for our good,
including the evil that happens, and how He knows the future (Romans 8:29-30) while
still allowing us to have free will (John 3:16).
I have
no idea how these two work together; I just know that they are both true.
I don’t have to reconcile them both because He is God and I trust Him.
If I
don’t understand it all, and I surely don’t, then it’s not God’s fault … it is
my finite mind’s incapability to understand the infinite mind of God.
It’s
like expecting an ant to sit in the cockpit of a jumbo jet and expect him to
fly it. That is why He is God. If I could completely understand
Him, then He wouldn’t be God.
Would you want to have a
deeper relationship with God?
God has made it possible for you to know Him
and experience
an amazing change in your own life by receiving His Son, Jesus Christ, and have
eternal life.
Say the following
prayer:
“Father God, I confess I
am a sinner and my sins have separated me from You.
I am truly sorry. I now want to turn
away from my past sinful life and live a new life pleasing to You.
Please forgive me, and
help me avoid sinning again.
I believe that Your Son,
Jesus Christ died for my sins, was resurrected from the dead, is alive, and
hears my prayer.
I invite Jesus to become
the Lord of my life, to rule and reign in my heart from this day forward. Thank
You that according to your Word, I am now born again.
Please send Your Holy
Spirit to help me obey You, and to do Your will for the rest of my life. I
promise to study Your Word – the Bible.
Please use me for Your
glory.
In Jesus' Name I pray. Amen.”
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Be Fed and More! LIKE A SHEPHERD HE LEADS US
Jack Wellman is a father and grandfather and a Christian author,
freelance writer, and pastor at the Mulvane (KS) Brethren church in Mulvane,
Kansas. Graduate work at Moody Bible Institute. His books are inexpensive
paperbacks that are theological in nature: “Teaching Children The Gospel/How to
Raise Godly Children,“ “Do Babies Go To Heaven?/Why Does God Allow Suffering?,“
"The Great Omission; Reaching the Lost for Christ," and “Blind Chance
or Intelligent Design?, Empirical Methodologies & the Bible."
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